When seeing a therapist is not enough if have mental illness

spam deleted. Thanks! 'here's to your health!' I live with anxiety, depression, fear and anger.I also have chronic pain from a spinal injury. Thankfully I have a dog as a companion. However she is the only one I can trust. It does get lonely. Meeting and being around others is hard as most of them are happier than me. I can't relate to them and visa versa. Lately I have had to push myself to so things as am sad. I was in two car accidents too and have a head injury. This causes memory and concentration problems too. On the up side, I am self sufficient. Mostly I listen to Christian music as it is calming. I also do mindfulness coloring, play chess online, watch TV once in awhile, have plants,write,attend support groups on phone, walk my dog, care for her, pray,eat tastey meals, as just got pizza tonight. The trick is to do something if down, not waddle in self pity, to feel better. As per Recovery Inc., support group, 'move a muscle and change a thought', 'resoluteness of the muscles overcomes the self defeatist babble of the brain'. This group is based on book Mental Health Through Mental Will Training written by Dr. Abraham Low, for his patients. Another group is Emotions Anonymous, based on 12 steps. Say powerless over emotions. Faith based teaching for symptoms is helpful too. Example: replace fear with faith, sadness with 'joy comes in the morning', 'don't let the sun go down on your anger', 'be anxious for nothing.'. DBT skills such as mindfulness, distress tolerance with meditation, taking a vacation if overstressed like going to sleep. Cognitive skills is another. Replace negative insecure frightened thoughts that cause negative emotions, with secure positive ones. If use some or all of these daily, you will feel better. It is a choice. Through action, even if don't want to, you feel better. Do the thing you hate or fear and gain the most confidence, comfort comes by bearing discomfort, showing can do it. We are sensitive so we Need to be less so and not let the outside environs effect our inner. People can be rude. We Need to let them go or are tossed about like fish in a tide. It is important to protect yourself. Try to get with supportive, kind people. Don't reveal yourself too soon until know is safe. Some will never understand or even try Like to call us crazy, stupid. Mean. Distance self.Stigma is out there. Why I don't work regular job. Write for money and do vending sometimes. Something. I would like to get together with others for lunch, coffee in Capital area, NY so not so alone. Get back to me if interested. Also comment here if can relate to topic. Thanks.

Archives of Conferences on BPD

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I have been having a hard time of late. Why? I suppose alot to accept. Don't have to like it though.

Alone alot as no close friends,any one to do things with or to help me if needed help even if for barter.

Making no money,not for lack of trying. Someone went to an event with me and I paid her back with jewelry make. I asked her if could do an event with me but she had plans. She has a job. Since don't hear from her,figure won't call anymore.

I know people but they have their own lives and problems so detach from me and mine.

type with 1 finger as need battery so hold pc plug or pc cuts off.

welcome to my life.

no car to get to events to sell jewelry. just had concert this weekend.
could have sold if got there. then there's the fee. how can I pay if don't have as not making it? could borrow from ma but her money. Am I a masochist as I have a solution but don't take it? No I don't like pain but avoiding it can be painful too when interferes with living your life. No guarantee will make anything and not gambling with mom's money.

Other than vending,nothing can do given my challenges. Yes I can share with you some things I do to cope like meditation,pray,stretch,deep breathe and so on..but not like I get beyond this. I feel with some support could. Did go to online recovery inc. meeting which helped. had anted to teach meditation class in town. librarians unfriendly tho i know skills. feel they on't call me. I also asked churches if could run ea and recovery inc meetings there. they need to look into it. I feel like will go nuts at times. Is meetups too where can invite people thru service online to group in area like for bpd. Don't think library would approve it. Meditation with someone,not me as stigmatize me,yes would approve. Keep me down here and broke. I could make money off it.

I think of moving as saw ad in Albany,1br for $400. I pay $650 now. Could save $,live better but why so cheap problem bad area. Pic looked nice. dunno. darned if do darned if don't. Mom in home here and would be hard to see her often as $34 round trip by bus and only run at rush hour so layover long back. Is doable and even though spend alot in car fare still cheaper than here. Would have $100 more a month.

Is a pain moving but hat is worse as sucks living here like this. If in Albany,could go to day time meetings,maybe get a p/t job somewhere,trauma therapist up there. I get treated like an alien here. They have family friends. Since I can't bond because of how raised, I don't. I wish could. Is best I keep my distance. As for a job,this comes up there too as can do for awhile but then falls apart. Sometimes I ish I was in a half way house but was for a month and they weren't supportive at all. Then I say how abot hospital,day program but then is the same. Just go to groups and alone rest of time as patients are either mean,noncommunicative,in on worlds,violent. Is why I think of suicide. I don't because of pets,mom,me but it gets tiring being me alot going thru this.

This only started recently as time on hands. I have to keep busy or get into my head.
with depression don't want to do much though so is the rub. I feel better after I do. Also I work programs daily like DBT,CBT,12 step,Recovery Inc,pray. Is like a seesaw. The devil,the illness,the negative thoughts,memories,anger,fear,every rotten thing anyone has done or said recently that I know on one side and the positive,secure thoughts,God,scripture from the Bible,program tools on the other. Is a war within myself going on. It stops after 8PM,has been like this for a long time, as day is done,only for it to start again the next day when rise. I enjoy being alone with my pets,being outside sitting in my yard alone at night,like the aloneness as no one understands here except someone else with this. I work hard to be honest,not manipulative. I am screaming inside,help me! Can't you see how much pain I am in? I just want some attention in a good way. Someone to talk to me nicely and not tell me what i should be doing like they understand where I am coming from as they don't. I have an exneighbor I see every once in awhile who is clueless as to why someone so smart as me and aware of her issues can't rise above them. The answer to that is if do too much I crack up.

Two things, I on't get involved with anyone nor will I work many hours. Why? If doesn't work out I will have a breakdown and be in hosital,not a nice place to be and be psychotic. I fear I won't get ot and will never return to any semblance of sanity which I do have. Is like I live in a parallel universe with the average person. I hear what are saying arond me but it is completely alien to my life. I hear commercials like this activity is going on this weekend. I can't get there so I stay home. I would like to go but no money either. If did though, I would appear perfectly normal as the mask i wear is so good. That is why noone has any compassion for me. They have to work for what have and figure so do I. What do you do with someone too imbalanced to? Live as I do I guess falling between a system that doesn't work,one day at a time in quiet desperation.

I get so tired of cli nical and text book reports of what BPD is. I want to know what one can do if they have it.