looking for live/work space...

spam deleted. Thanks! 'here's to your health!'

read more here at 'Albany barn' an arts community in Albany ny.

 to revitalize ailing community in arbor hill.

old school pictured here restored and rehabbed into an artist community, center.

 

I have an interview 4/7/14 at 7 PM work live/work space for myself. wish me well and good luck to get it. Is based on income in that need to be in need like myself who lives on disability income.

Mental health takes center stage

Mental health takes center stage

While I appreciate your comments to my posts, I would ask firstly that they pertain to topic and are not spam in nature. Thanks!

I thought you'd find it interesting,especially the number of people with disorders and growing. Is important to get treatment yes but is also important to take the shame out of doing so and about having problems mentally. I know I tried to kick this myself in college as counseling center was in campus Hub and didn't want anyone to see me going there. I was embarrassed and also ignorant of what I had and why (due to abuse and neglect as a child,bullying and rejection from peers,being a crime victim). I thought I could just feel better if I faked it til made it. It didn't work as effected my functioning,even sleep patterns,was hard to concentrate with all the thoughts in my head,hard to recall things to learn,felt confused,lost and alone. Didn't see others going thru this as judged my insides against their outsides. Some just hide it better and seem to know how to mix with others to fit in and keep it to selves.

I had pastoral counseling from in my senior year of high school so could graduate despite moods. My grades had slumped. I felt though I could participate in class discussions by just sharing my thought and following discussions, I had a hard time learning anything for reasons mentioned earlier. I also didn't do much of my home work unless teacher really riled me into it. Mom threatened to send me to public school if didn't shape up. i didn't understand why I suddenly didn't want to do anything. I certainly didn't know it was physical due to chemical imbalance of serotonin in my brain. I also was shy but self out there as had to so was very nervous,awkward. Still am though I know they are just people. Some people are just plain mean but is their problem. I choose to ignore,avoid and not talk to them. If have to deal with them I don't personalize what they do or say. Just the way they are. I have some people around where I live like that. Is their problem as they lack compassion,are judgemental,angry as doing work hate and see me hanging around in yard even though have disabilities. Say something I can do. Will add on that another day as we know system is flawed..They don't see how fortunate they are that they can sustain employment. They make comments within ear shot about me. I have God though.l What do they have? Just themselves. I wouldn't want to live that way or be them. I try to keep the focus on me and not let it get to me eventhough they can't mind their business. I choose not to get angry about it. The Lord will take care of them. and I pray for them too.

I went to church last night and joined with other believers. Had dinner there too. Had a nice time singing,praising and thanking the Lord too. I use it like a support group as don't have one but a mental health chat which is not the same.

I got to stay in a park with my dog today as was with dog trainer

Was getting a lesson. They said no dogs here and I said she is a work dog not a pet. Later today I walked into Mobil Matrt with Carvel and subway attached to it and I got a sub and sundae. Manager didn't have a problem but young chick behind county didn't want dog and I said you all have to let me in or I call police and who ever doesn't let me in can be arrested and place gets fined as is the law. She shut up fast. Also I said I got in park after she said they don't allow dogs. I live in a rural community behind the times who only seem to understand blingd and deaf with work dogs and not those with invisible ones like me. I carry not from my doctor as need Brandy and proof of training from trainer. Brandy is a rescue trained to be assistance dog. I already battled for her in my housing agianst about 6 closed minded mean spirted old bitties as live in senior disabled housing. They tried to get me out as I'm not 100 like them. They are gossipy too and do it as I pass or near my windows and doors. Makes me nutty. Sometimes there is an art show or there is a free swim at pool or bird watching in park,art class but while I can afford to see it and participate paying $ 10 round trip for taxi gets costly. WAs supposed to get $ for transport but funding lost due to budget cut backs. rest here do own thing. Noone here to talk to or be with. So is lonely. Average person wants nothing to do with me as not much in common. I have no husband as I attracted users and abusers and no kids as I felt not fair as I felt I wouldn't make a good mother as medicine fatigues me and I go thru memory loss so don't do alot in day. Hard to motivate self and concentrate too. I often feel like I'm in a box. While there are grouips to support those with disabilities, other than day programs which not alot goin on, there is not much for those with disabilites. Would be nice if I could attend an art class or studio art time with local artists,jam with other singers and guitarist,attend a writer's work shop,meet with a gardening group. There are some in my area but I haven't been able to get to any.

I came up here with a freind but he is a dry alcoholic who is irresponsible with $ and doesn't open mail or handle his affairs well. WE came up north from outside city together but while he visits occasionally I only have me to depend on. He likes to cook,garden,pets and is a good listener. That is all.
Sadly I get quite down and find it hard to get inspired as little $,no car(shared one),few people to do things with,most work or go to school and my life is different. I accept this. I have been looking for used car '95 or older from private owner as don't have much to play with. Once get can be out of here alot.

I asserted self today and wasn't passive or aggressive. May have been bullied and victimized and even am now in my housing but I stood my ground today