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Showing posts with label psychotic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label psychotic. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 01, 2015

Dating Self into a Pychotic Disorder

spam deleted. Thanks! 'here's to your health!'

Well firstly , let me tell you i haven't dated in 8 years and am celibate that long too athough am satisfied if know what mean. I keep to and entertain self,buy my own candy an flowers. Is nice to have the right man but really don'teed one. Societyconditions ubetter with someone.The last one was with mostly came for the s#x. Last time saw him he showed up at my door because alleged relatives shared house with wanted him out. Let him stay weekend before showed him the door. Past relationships were in were mosty with working strangers who were emotionally unavailable. I learned sadly to be also. They would try to make me into someone wasn't as couildn't accept was shy,nervous,moody and was in and out of work as uncomfortable there. Like many men they wanted a beautiful,confident,successful,fun,funny,smart woman. Well was attractive and smart and could be funny and fun but self conscious. Always surprised me that men who weren't paying my bills, cared if wasn't working steadily. Why wasn't it enough to be with and like them? Not being liked for self is like dating yourself into Psychotic disorder.

I temped for awhile working in offices doing clerical,reception work,did cashier work at supermarkets,retail stores. Was bored silly. I gave up on relationships as when ended made me very sad where as they landed on their feet as i felt more than they did. Eventually dated casually but was unfulfilling and lowered my self esteem. Thought this way would have connection even if just physically without the disappointment and hurt of rejection. This behavior and acting is Dating your self into Psychotic disorder. Eventually became an entrepreneur in '96,opened a pet service. did that four years,lobbied in capital of NY for a year, did artistic modeling,painted,made jewelry,sold it at fairs,fests,etc,taught art class,jewelry design. Lately writing articles online and have a male friend who has been in life 17 years. We used to date but didn't work out. He has some issues as do I but we support each other emotionally and are honest as can be without the B.S. that often goes with dating as each is impressing the other at first.

Later realize person are with isn't who thought was as all of us come with baggage and are imperfect. The trick is beng able to love each other in spite of and perhaps because of it. That's what makes us unique. Sadly, this culture,squelches our personalities and we become human doings rather than human beings and lose our humanity with one another and instead function on a very superficial instead of spontaneous level. Often we hide our true selves for fear we won't be liked for who really are so instead are but reflections of what others want us to be. All this lying and hiding and wearing of masks can make, cause dating your self into a psychotic disorder if let it. My best advice would be to work on being secure in yourself before take on a man. They don't think like us remember. Having a few woman friends can talk to that 'get you' is best as the man you're with may not. Sorry

Raise Mental Health Awareness Today (May=Mental Health Month)

Raise Mental Health Awareness Today (May=Mental Health Month)
Why are there no runs for Mental Health?!

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